Friday, July 07, 2006

Natural Magentas

So what do you do when your boss books a meeting with you just so that no one else can book the same spot and confine him within a boardroom while the world cup soccer semi-finals are going on? Well, you recall how much you like pink, green and purple hair.

When my boss told me that the meeting on Wednesday was actually for watching the game, I couldn’t help but chuckle to myself. What kind of a boss would do something like that? Pretty cool, I must say.

What I also did was check out the score of the game that was going on at that moment; and while browsing the triple “W”, came across a picture of a certain fan wrapped in an Italian jersey with the flag drawn on her cheek and her hair dyed pink. Her companion for the day – in Ukrainian attire – was green headed. I thought that was kind of neat.

So I spent the next couple of minutes thinking about my fascination for pink, green and purple heads. I am not entirely sure when or how I started to grow a liking for these colors, but I find them pretty funky when they are chosen by women to represent their hair dyes, especially when they have streaks rather than the same shade throughout. Another color that attracts me – though to a lesser extent – is red, mixed with blonde.

That night, as I lay awake in bed (yeah, I am really getting robbed of sleep lately), I wondered how it’d be like if those hues were natural. Well, doesn’t seem like a terrestrial phenomenon, does it? We would probably have to turn to our neighbors in and around the solar system in that case, I guess. No life in those places? Oh but there will be…there will be inhabitation in those foreign lands one day. And that day, in my humble opinion, is not too far away.

Just think about it – even two centuries ago, our ancestors were horse-backers, and here we are, ten scores and a couple of years later, cruising along at speeds unimaginable back then. Technology has advanced quite a bit over the years, and I can foresee Man losing His inter-planet flight virginity in a few decades.

At the rate the world is mixing, I agree with comedian Russell Peters that it will eventually become a breeding ground for beige people. I also believe that, several centuries after that happens, there will be a day that overpopulation and the extinction of resources will force the mass emigration of Homo Sapiens to alien bodies that are not viewable by the naked eye.

We know how climate and environment affect physical features in humans. What if the environment on those planets leads to great variations in the features of our descendants? Maybe it will lead to people with not only different hair color, but also different body structures and skin. Then there will be a day when traveling to Jupiter will be like catching a plane from Paris to New York. “Can you believe how much I gained after landing here?” a worried young woman will be overheard enquiring her fellow Earthling boyfriend over the phone at a hotel on the largest planet in the solar system.

Such improvements in communication systems can only lead to one thing – and that is more mixing: intergalactic to be precise. However, how much will emigration change the structure of humans? Will it also change genetic mappings? So much so that intergalactic mating will not produce desired results, or any result at all? I am not much of a biology guy and don’t have the answers, so these things keep me wondering.

Then there’s this other possibility. What if humans land on a planet in a distant galaxy to discover that it is already inhabited by a similar species? What happens if one of us falls for a woman with green antennae protruding out of her skull and vice versa? Surely mating will lead to nothing in that case. So will that be an end to diversity right there? Will diversity be restricted to within the borders of the earth’s atmosphere?

It’s been roughly a week since I watched “Superman Returns”, and I still wonder what the director was thinking. How could the insemination of Lois Lane by Clarke Kent have produced an asthmatic offspring with no resemblance to his parents? Isn’t it a lot like saying “Cat + Dog = Catdog”?

Going back to Man’s population of other uninhabited heavenly bodies, I would like to believe that genetic mappings will still be consistent enough for inter-planetary breeding to be possible. What would be cooler than a couple of blue teenage girls gossiping about the cutest guy in class, who happens to be orange, and wears a triangular skull over his shoulders? Saturn, with all those gaseous rings circling her, would probably be an ideal honeymoon location, and a businessman’s day would begin with breakfast at his mansion in Andromeda, punctuated by lunch and meetings on the other end of some of the busiest black holes in the Universe, and end with dinner with the Prime Minister twenty thousand leagues under the Pacific Ocean.

So the bottom-line is, I love diversity. Too bad I won’t live to see most of the stuff that I have mentioned here; and too bad there won’t be natural pink heads during my time.

Dyes and artificial streaks it is for now, then.


At 2:11 PM, Anonymous nadivrahman said...

haha......loved the superman bit.....and bt was on the verge of tears when u sed tht green girl+normal guy= nothing..broke my girlfriend's green....oh the agony....


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